Rite of Passage
by PutMoneyInThyPurse
Summary: Hiccup gets a tattoo. Toothless is not amused. Can be read as platonic soulmates or slash.


Notes: Pidgin Dragonese. Can be read as platonic soulmates or straight-up slash.

* * *

 _Toothless not-like._

Hiccup has been flat on his back in bed for a week, sweating like a pig, and all he gets is complaints. "This is what I… get. Ungrateful dragon."

 _Toothless not-like._ This time the dragon's voice is plaintive. He noses under the sheet to lick at Hiccup's bare torso, laving the swollen, reddened mark on his side. It curves all the way from Hiccup's back around his side to his stomach, so there isn't a position he can lie in that doesn't bring pain. Except when Toothless licks it: Night Fury saliva apparently is healing. It eases his pain, at least.

But the licking itself hurts, until the saliva settles. Hiccup shudders, clutching at Toothless' head. Toothless makes a sound somewhere between a growl and a croon. _Hiccup in pain. Toothless._ _ **Not.**_ _Like._

"How was I supposed to know I'd get a reaction from the… _uhh…_ ink?"

 _Danger. Death._

"C'mon, Toothless, nobody ever died from a tattoo!"

Toothless shakes his head, gentling the motions of his tongue so that it presses tenderly against the raw flesh rather than rasping over it. _Berk gravestones say different._

"And just when did _you_ learn to read?"

Toothless finishes his ministrations and sits back, eyes narrowed. _Many things you don't know, hatchling._

"You're really scraping the bottom of the barrel for insults, aren't you."

The dragon shakes his head and huffs. Hiccup's eyes drift closed: he has no energy for this right now. The huff turns to a croon, and a cool tongue bathes his face. "Thanks… bud," he whispers with his eyes closed. Everything is _hot._ "Hey. Toothless."

 _Here._

"I know you are." He's been here since that miserable day the tattoo started swelling up. "I'm sorry." His hand falls limply to his side and Toothless nuzzles it.

 _You should be._

Hiccup recalls what an excellent idea it seemed to get a big, important dragon tattoo. A Night Fury curving all the way round his body, from his stomach round his side to his back. Only trouble was, he wanted to fill in the Night Fury _all_ in black. The guy said it would hurt, but hey, Hiccup's survived losing a leg, right? He knows from hurt. How bad could it be?

Bad, as it turned out. Make that _very, very_ bad. The artist used a knife to flay off the skin and rub in the pigment. Hiccup was trembling and barely avoiding crying out throughout. Poor Toothless roared and screamed and shot plasma blasts all through the process, only calmed by Hiccup, who kept telling him it was important to him, which the dragon didn't understand but permitted. But when it got very bad, Hiccup held onto Toothless, clawing and scrabbling at his scales and pressing his head against his friend's as tears of pain slipped from his eyes. Toothless growled low so as not to hurt Hiccup's ears and purred as best he could to comfort him and restrained himself from killing the tattoo artist because Hiccup told him not to, and Hiccup knows how much that cost him. As if that wasn't bad enough, Hiccup sauntered out of the tattoo hut – well, if by 'sauntered' you mean 'carried out limp and trembling on Toothless' back' – thinking the worst would be over in a couple of days, only to develop a reaction to the ink.

Yeah, not one of his finer moments.

The upside of Hiccup collapsing flat on his back from fever and pain is that Toothless stopped being mad, but the downside is that that's only because he was _absolutely frantic._ And now…"You're really mad about this, aren't you."

 _Yes._

Hiccup has nothing left. He's so worn out by the fever and pain that he just lies there.

 _Sorry. You rest._ The pain is starting to fade. Toothless licks his forehead softly. _Not leaving you. Rest._

Before Hiccup drifts off, he thinks he feels a soft paw press his own.

* * *

When he next wakes, the paw is still there. He still can't sit up, but he thinks he's feeling better…? He's not sure. There's a bowl of some sort of soup by the bed. His stomach growls, but also sort of cringes. He manages to turn his head toward Toothless, whose head is resting on the side of the bed. His breath ghosts over Hiccup's sore side, warm against the already overheated flesh but welcome nonetheless. "I love you, ya big scaly baby."

His friend's eyes flick open. Hiccup could spend all his life looking into those great big pools of green and it wouldn't be enough. He realizes he's smiling. Toothless sees it too. _Better?_

"I think so. Maybe." He smiles, turns his head a fraction more. "Mostly just really happy to see you, bud." Toothless purrs wordlessly. "What's with the hand-holding?"

Toothless withdraws his paw, and Hiccup is too weak to catch and keep it. _Not-like?_

"No, I love it." Hiccup hates how weak his voice is coming out. "You just never did that before."

 _Watch humans. Dragons touch faces, humans touch paws. Human paws sensitive like dragon faces. Maybe like dragon tongues._ Toothless' tone is tender and amused. _Trying it. Not so bad._

"Give it back, then."

Instead of putting his paw back on Hiccup's hand, Toothless reaches out with both paws, careful not to touch Hiccup's inflamed side, and pulls him up in bed. _Drink first._

"I'm not sure I can. Don't feel so good."

Toothless croons to him and pulls him in, letting the single spot on his middle that isn't sore rest against his scales. _You must have water. Soup or water. I smell you dry._

"Dehydrated, that's what we call it." Hiccup grins gamely at Toothless. "Okay, let's do this." He reaches over to the bedside table for the soup. The moment he twists his torso, the motion pulls on his side, a knife of pain that feels like it's going to cleave his body in two. Hiccup cries out. "Ah! Stupid, stupid, _stupid…"_

He freezes in place, face clenched in a grimace. He's trembling with residual pain, tears pricking at his eyelids and wetting his lashes. Toothless crouches close, worried green eyes in his peripheral vision, purring to him. As the wall of pain recedes, the purring resolves into _Hiccup Hiccup Hiccup love you love you love you._

"Never un… understood that before," he rasps.

 _You never listened,_ Toothless responds, but his voice is soft… and breaking.

If there's one thing Hiccup has never been able to stand, it's Toothless in any sort of distress. "Hey. I'm okay. It's okay." Hiccup tries for a smile. He carefully, so carefully, raises an arm to Toothless' snout.

 _Careful._

Toothless meets him halfway, nuzzling at his neck. A human could not touch more gently. A gentle lick to his neck, soft breath down his tunic. Hiccup relaxes, eyeing the table, and wonders if he can reach the soup this time. "Thanks, bud," he whispers. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

Toothless stiffens.

"Bud?"

 _Soup._

"No, there was something."

 _Soup!_

"There was something." Hiccup turns his head carefully to Toothless. "What was it?"

 _Soup first. Then talk. Wait._

Toothless puts his forehead against the bedside table and pushes the entire thing closer, within easy arm's reach of Hiccup. Hiccup's heart swells, as it always has when Toothless rearranges the world to make things easier for him. "Soup first then talk. Okay, I can live with that."

 _And medicine._

"Toothless, putting the salve on more often won't make it get better faster." Hiccup finds he's ravenous, and slurps the soup for several moments before giving up and lifting the lukewarm bowl to his lips, taking great gulps. "Ah man, that tastes great. I was hungry."

Toothless lays his head lightly on Hiccup's lap, and starts purring. _Love you love you love you love you love you love you._

Eventually, Hiccup is done. He makes to lie down. _Wait._ Toothless comes up next to him. _Hold onto Toothless if pain bad._

"Uh, maybe not?" Hiccup doesn't ever fear that Toothless will hurt him; it's the prospect of moving at all that makes his body cringe from fear of pain. "I don't know if…"

 _Wait. Hold this._ Toothless offers his head spines and ears as handholds. _Toothless not-move. Use these for moving, not-use your_ grunt-huff.

"Muscles?" Toothless nods, recognizing the human word. "You want me to hold onto these?" Hiccup asks, running his hands over the delicate spines. The tenderness that floods Hiccup washes away his pain. "I always thought they were fragile. You sure I won't hurt you?"

Toothless' loving eyes meet his, but he snorts. _Human hands hurt dragon skin? Who do you think you are, Stoick the Vast?_

There are few things funnier than Toothless using human idioms, which he's been doing more and more of late. Hiccup bursts out laughing, groaning as it pulls on the cuts in his side. His hands tighten involuntarily around Toothless' smooth spines, an anchor in stormy seas. As he breathes, trying to control the pain, it drains away, leaving coolness and relief. It takes him a moment to realize that Toothless is giving his inflamed wound the same gentle, tender licking as before. "That really does help, bud," Hiccup breathes, still clutching at Toothless.

Toothless' tongue is gentle and loving, and he doesn't respond until Hiccup's side isn't burning anymore and even his fever feels a little better. He only replies when Hiccup gingerly lowers himself to the bed, still holding onto his friend's ear-plates. _Hiccup not-need help if Hiccup not-do stupid things in the first place._

Hiccup pants until he has his breath back. Lying flat, feeling marginally more human, he looks over at Toothless. "So what was that about earlier?"

Toothless' gaze flickers to his tattoo, and he looks away. "You need to watch out there, bud. You're getting more human every day."

The snort of derision he's awaiting doesn't come. Toothless slumps. "I can't reach you. C'mon, look at me." Of course Toothless is guilted into looking up at that, and Hiccup reaches out, gentling his voice. "Hey, bud," he coaxes. "You can tell me. You know that, don't you? What's wrong?"

Toothless looks at the tattoo. _Hiccup use Toothless to hurt himself._

For a long moment, Hiccup thinks Toothless is referring to some incident or other that may have erased itself from Hiccup's memory, some play-fight or expedition where Hiccup hurt himself using Toothless' flame. He's still racking his brains when he sees Toothless' wide green eyes fixed resentfully on the design on his side. "You don't… like…" he begins, thinking as he speaks. "You don't like the tattoo because it looks like you? And it got infected?"

Toothless flinches. _Hiccup hurting…_ He shakes his head as if a bee has gotten into his ear.

How does Toothless always melt Hiccup's heart like this? "C'mere, ya big scaly baby. Come on, I can't move," he says, exploiting his illness shamelessly. Toothless grudgingly approaches, sliding his head under Hiccup's arm. "Toothless, I've been hurt before."

 _But not hurt with Toothless-drawing on it._

 _"Oh!"_ Hiccup is so touched he's robbed of words for a moment. "Oh, Toothless! It's not gonna hurt forever! I wanted to have you with me all the time!"

 _You have me with you all the time,_ Toothless grunts, sounding more human than dragon.

"I meant symbolically."

Toothless noses closer, pressing his tongue to Hiccup's side, his eyes mournful. _Hiccup suffer pain to honor Toothless?_

"Yeah, and I'd do it again."

The dragon pulls back his head. His pupils are no longer round and affectionate but narrow and commanding. _Hatchling. Listen!_

"That's flattering."

 _Flattering my eye._

"You're really getting too human for your own—"

 _Hiccup like to see Toothless suffer? To honor Hiccup?_

Hiccup's stomach tightens. "No. Of course not."

 _You like to see Toothless cut with a knife?_

"Toothless, don't even say that! What are you…"

 _You see Toothless_ hiss-whistle?

"Sorry, bud… didn't catch that."

 _Look. Say how you feel if someone hurting Toothless, if Toothless like this—_

Toothless drops to the floor, and _damn_ he's a good actor. _Silent, not making sound, but crying?_ The dragon curls into a ball, shaking, eyes tight shut. He flinches rhythmically, as if someone's hurting him on purpose.

"Bud…" Toothless' head arches back, as if suffering, and he clenches his teeth and whimpers. Hiccup stares helplessly at his tightly clenched face and exposed throat. "No!"

Toothless' eyes snap open, green and clear and wise. _No?_ He rolls to his feet. _Good. Now you know Toothless feeling. Seeing Hiccup so much pain, not crying, only pain._ The green eyes are not so clear, for a minute. Then Toothless gets that narrowed-eyed, ironic glance that he uses often for reproof. _You like that thing on you?_ He jerks his head at the tattoo. _Every time I see it… I remember you hurt because you love me._

Hiccup waves a careful hand at Toothless' missing tailfin. "Every time I see this, I remember I hurt you. So we're even."

Toothless recoils, hissing. _Did Hiccup choose hurt because of—_

"No no no no no! No, I didn't!" Hiccup holds up both hands, wincing at the pull. "That wasn't the reason. I didn't hurt myself in some kind of getting-even thing, no. _No_."

 _Then why?_

"Tattoos are important to Vikings! I just… Toothless, humans have things… Maybe it doesn't make sense." He slumps. "Guess a dragon wouldn't be into cutting their body and rubbing ink into it just because it's something their village does."

Toothless raises one eyebrow and narrows the other eye. _Ya think?_

Hiccup snickers. He's always loved Toothless' wry snark. But the sound seems to infuriate the dragon. _I should do the same,_ threatens Toothless.

Still feeling mischievous now he's not burning up in pain, Hiccup smiles sidelong at him. "Flat outa luck… _Night Fury."_ He says it like a playful insult. "Scales won't take ink. Guess you'll just have to stay jealous."

Toothless' eyes are slits. Hiccup knows he's mad, but it's such fun to get his goat. _Then maybe Toothless should just get a_ hiss-squeal.

"Sorry, bud?"

Toothless jumps up and down and around in the too-small confines of Hiccup's bedroom. He disappears downstairs, tail undulating behind him. He's back in a moment with a poker. Toothless lays it on the stone slab as Hiccup watches, and fires its tip with a tightly controlled plasma blast. He does it again and again until the very tip of the poker is glowing absolutely red-hot. He turns it on the slab until the handle is facing Hiccup. Then he crouches, raising his wing, exposing his soft, vulnerable side. _Should Toothless get it here?_ He turns onto his back, laying his belly bare. _Or here?_

Hiccup's breath stops for a moment. "A… _brand?"_

Hiss-squeal. _Brand. Yes._ Toothless meets his eyes, underside bared, pupils slit. _Go on, do it. Brand Toothless, human._ He nudges the poker's handle with his snout.

This hurts to listen to. "Ah, come _on…"_

Narrowed pupils meet Hiccup's. _Hiccup want Toothless to find dragon-hunters to brand? For mark? Like Hiccup?_

"Quit fooling around, Toothless!" Hiccup can't help the way his voice cracks.

 _Not fooling. Hiccup pain for days. Not fooling. Since Hiccup so much wanting to mark himself…_

"Toothless…"

His friend's green eyes go to the red-hot poker, then to his own side. Hiccup thinks he might take that poker in his own body rather than imagine that mark of humiliation on his friend. Rather than see him hurt, rather than hear the dragon scream. "Toothless, that's different. It didn't hurt nearly as much. And I _chose_ it. It's not a mark of shame."

 _Toothless choose too. Waiting. Brand me now?_

"Okay." Hiccup buries his head in his hands. "Okay, I get it. This hurts. Is this how you're feeling?"

When he uncovers his face, his vision is filled with his friend's open, earnest face and wide green eyes. _Yes._ Toothless dips his head to lap tenderly at Hiccup's side. _Please. No more Hiccup-hurt. Hurt Toothless._

Heart aching, Hiccup strokes Toothless' head. He shudders at the thought of the red-hot poker even _touching_ his friend, and rubs his hands down Toothless' sides, pressing his fingers into the soft, vulnerable skin of his sides and flank. "I'd never let anything touch you," he mutters. "The thought of you… the _thought_ of you…"

 _Now you know how I feel._

Dragonese doesn't have pronouns, but Toothless occasionally uses Human usage when he wants to make a point. Hiccup presses his face into the warm place under Toothless' neck. "Yeah, I get it. I did want to get that tattoo, and I still think it's going to look amazing, but if I'd known it made you feel the way _I'd_ feel if you were…" he swallows, "if someone…" He presses his palms into Toothless' sides, glorying in the feel of the smooth, unhurt flesh of his beloved best friend's body, unable to bring himself to say it. "I wouldn't hurt you that way on purpose. I'm sorry I put you through that, bud. I never meant to do that."

Toothless moans softly. _Toothless' picture. Hurt you._

"Your picture didn't hurt me. I was hurt because I'm a damned idiot."

The dragon's eyes are still sad, and Hiccup feels like a heel. _How Toothless always see this every day, remember hurt?_

His friend has taken off his flying gear in deference to the fact that Hiccup isn't going anywhere, so it's easy for Hiccup to snag Toothless' tail and pull it around to him. "Same way I see this every day and remember." His chest _still_ feels like there's a knife in it when he sees the scar. He brings the tail gently up to his face and presses his cheek to the shiny, unnaturally flat patch of grey-black where the fin was torn clean off. It's the only place on Toothless' body where there is skin and not scale. Because Hiccup maimed him.

Meeting Toothless' eyes, Hiccup puts out his own silly little tongue and draws it across the scar in a long, slow lick. He can't scent-mark and he has no saliva to speak of compared with a dragon, but he knows what he's saying in Dragonese. _Every inch of you is precious to me. I love you._ He licks Toothless' stump again and again. _I care for you. I love you. You are mine. I love you._ There are tiny ridges where the wound healed. Hiccup shudders to feel them and caresses them with the tip of his tongue. _I love you._ He lays the flat of his tongue against the scar and licks it again, resorting to Human words to express himself. "I'd do anything to give it back. I wish I'd never hurt you. I love you, bud. I love you."

The heat in his side recedes, pushed away as Toothless lays his tongue flat against the skin. The dragon's tongue shifts a fraction, covering all the hurt, his purr thrumming through Hiccup's middle. _I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you._

Their eyes meet. Something in Hiccup jumps. The entire surface of his skin is trembling, aching, _yearning_ to be _one_. The dragon's pupils narrow, then widen, then narrow again. "Hey. It's okay," he murmurs, his instinct always to comfort. "I'm here."

 _I know._ Toothless' eyes are sardonic, but his breath is coming faster – a bellows pumping bright, hot life into flames that once lay banked. Teeth retracted, he softly closes his mouth over Hiccup's waist, covering the tattoo on his front and back and side. It's comfort, it's soft and warm and wet and he can feel Toothless' steady pulse through the flesh of his mouth and the skin of his side, symbiotic. It's close, and he wants to be closer.

"Toothless…?"

 _Yes?_

Toothless' voice is _playful._ He _knows._

Something coils in Hiccup's belly, in his loins. His blood is pulsing in his veins and somehow all of a piece with the slow, powerful heartbeat he can feel in the soft mouth encircling his middle. Hiccup's breath comes faster. His heart is thudding against his ribcage like it wants to break its way out. Then Toothless brings up his tongue and lays it flat in the hollow in Hiccup's chest, separated by half an inch of skin and bone from his hammering heart.

The contact is so visceral and intimate that both of them let out a small cry. Blindly, Hiccup licks the palm of his left hand and flats it n Toothless' tongue, feeling his own heartbeat through the spongy flesh that's a part of his friend. His breath hitches and there are tears in his eyes as he brings up his other hand to trace the notch in Toothless' tongue, dizzy with this new intimacy as he feels his friend's mouth cradle and soothe him, feels the pulsing of possibility in both their heartbeats. He wishes he could enfold Toothless as completely as his bigger friend is doing for him, he wishes he could fly and dive with Toothless together with this new knowledge, this new link, not new but the same, the same but deeper… He wishes he could do a thousand things.

But he's _sick,_ and he's dizzy, and in an instant Toothless' handling is less intimate and more practical, lowering him to a reclining position with mouth and wings and paws. And Hiccup trusts him to. They've always taken care of things when the other one can't. "Over to you, bud," he pants through the dizziness. "What do we do now?"

Toothless purrs, licking the tattoo although it's completely painless now. _Hiccup heal. Love later._

Hiccup reaches out blindly until his hand meets scales. "I love you now, big scaly lizard-baby."

 _Now and later._

"I can live with that."

 _Rest. Heal._

"Okay." Hiccup feels himself flailing. "Toothless? Could you…" He smiles. His friend is way ahead of him. Toothless' wing wraps around Hiccup, his tail curling around his knees. "It can't be comfortable like that for you, bud."

 _Toothless makes concessions because Hiccup is an idiot._ His friend's head slips under his arm on his uninjured side, the perfect thing to cuddle. _And remember, Hiccup not-need reminder of Toothless if Toothless_ _ **there.**_

"Point taken." Hiccup can't fight sleep off for long. "Explore later, bud?"

Hiccup loves what he's come to recognize as Toothless' laugh. His friend has several: a bark, an 'ulk ulk ulk' sound, and this one: a soft chuffing sound like grain being swished around in a basket. _Explore. Everywhere. Everything._

Hiccup grins as he falls to sleep. "Sounds like a plan."


End file.
